Life is a gift. Well then, are we aware that we make ourselves miserable for things we cannot control? There are many things we cannot control but real problems are in fact not things we cannot control. Real problems come out when we are ineffective despite the fact that we actually have the power to make the change. As Kurt Vonnegut says; “Enjoy the little things in life, because one day you will look back and realize they were the big things”
Leadership first starts with in our personal space. When we cannot manage dilemmas, conflicts and emotions the situations and environments starts to rule our world. Dilemma often emerges to meet our own expectations and others. If we cannot build mutual benefit relation then unnecessary sacrifices, dominant approaches and/ or indifference and/or disinterest surfaces. And naturally, this negative attitude harms the organisation and human resources.
Let me share few concerns I tend to hear quite often:
-I love the people in my team. They all have unique qualities. However if my boss keeps treating me inconsiderately like this, I may not find the energy essential for developing my team.
-Any minor flaw upsets me, even though everything is going right. I cannot coordinate my team. My new appointed assistant is calmer and practical. I feel insufficient when looking at her/him. This enervation has caused me to bring work problems to home. As if everything is great at home. I know I will end up regretting but quitting work and sparing some time for myself and my family seems like the best choice.
-I keep presenting information about new areas to my boss. But my boss pays no attention to my ideas regarding the development of my department for three years. I am bored I guess. I know I will regret it but I think I will support peoples search since I believe people who consistently developing deserve better places.
-I keep my glass full so others can also benefit. When my glass is empty I refill it. I know I will end up regretting but I am tired of finding the resources. I am going to leave the glass empty from now on. They can find their water from somewhere else.
-He/ She does not understand me. Looking at my performance level I deserve better. What is his/her expectation? He/She didn’t even say good morning yesterday, when I walked into his/her room; he/she didn’t even look at me. We get the same pay; I work harder than him/her. He wants things from me and doesn’t even say thank you. The new comer must be a connection. I guess he/she already discarded me. I wish there was more support.
Managers with self-leadership skills are:
– not captive of ones feelings
– focuses on people and meaning that will be co-created
– doesn’t make sudden and unplanned decisions
– strive to be determent and forward looking even though everything goes wrong
– result oriented
– cares about people’s ideas and brings solutions
– sees into the future, takes risks
– knows how to do the job, even though he/she does not do the job in practice
– notices things that nobody else notices
– knows people he/she works with and influences them.
– keeps his/her loyalty to his/her organisation
Leader is expected to bring the organisation to meet its targets and efficient. In order to benefit your organisation, faith and effort to constant development should be established, knowing oneself and self-acceptance is needed.
In other words; people are not born leaders, people learn to be leaders as they climb the steps one by one. You can choose to be a leader. It is about how you use information and experiences gathered in your journey since your childhood.
The followers expect the leader to show them respect, find solutions to their problems, motivate the team and be informed. They hope to be valued, and receive mutual benefit. Leaders realise this through “empathy”, “strategic vision”, and “effective communication”, “team management”, “ delegation ” and “feedback”.
Through these graphics we offer recruitment, development, succession planning, employee engagement and retention road maps for individuals and teams. Harrison Assessments International uses the trademark Paradox Technology analysis methods. Graphs above display some of the required traits for leadership.
Personal Note: I would like to thank Defne Akman for the translation of this essay.